“Hey Lord, you know I’m tired” “It’s all I got, is this enough?”

I’m so tired. 

     My eyes are strained. My stomach hurts. My body wants to crawl back into bed. But my mind is the most tired of all.

     My mind is so exhausted one word can send me into tears. I distance myself because the thought of socializing seems draining. My brain is pressing too hard on my skull. And sentences look like worms on paper.

     I never want to look at another essay prompt, where someone can decide if I’m worthy enough in a paragraph and through some numbers. 

     Can I get a break from homework for some time to go wander outside? Just a moment to talk to my family- more than the ten minutes I allow myself to eat dinner.

     How often have I driven back and forth to school without any recollection of doing so? Or zoned out in class just long enough to be clueless about the entire homework packet.

     How many kids have I seen asleep at their desks and how many times have I crashed for hours as soon as I arrived home?

     I’m drained…or rather we’re drained. Does anyone see that?

     I’m running on a never ending treadmill; where no matter how hard I work, I will never reach my destination. Thus, it never feels worth it. 

     I can admit that I can be an overachiever and a workaholic in hopes that I will one day accomplish great things. 

     But I know it is not just me overloading myself. It is the system we are pushed through; a system where we are taught to take tests, not learn. 

     One where we are not encouraged to explore subjects that interest us, but rather those that check off boxes just to receive a piece of paper. And no matter how many extracurriculars you stack on your resume, it is still not enough to get you into your dream school. 

     Let us not forget those who surround us, pressuring us to not make mistakes; those who tell us we have so many opportunities they never had and how much right now matters to our futures.

     ‘Work your butt off and it will pay off’, they say. So I trudge through this time, in hopes of seeing that bit of relief.

     It will all be worth it, they say. But I ask, at what expense?

     At what point is it too much? Is it the point where you are sick, physically and mentally?

     When will it be worrying enough that most teens can agree and identify with these words, that someone might stand up and make a change.

     Because if someone does not, we are quickly en route to be the new burnout generation.