“Low self-esteem is like driving with the hand-brake on.” states Maxwell Maltz; Confidence crashes affects teenagers’ learning, social skills, health

     “I wish I was shorter. Am I too fat? I’m literally the biggest girl in my class. Does my acne make me look like a pepperoni pizza? Am I too dark? Will he like my hair pulled back or out? Oops, I have to wax my mustache! I’m the only girl at school who doesn’t wear crop tops. He’ll never like me. I’ll never be good enough.”

     This is what goes on in my mind daily. And I’m not the only one. Discovering new ways to receive attention and validation from a person I’ve said two words to. The search for perfection leads me to a dead-end every time and yet I continue to circle back and hunt for an alternative route to flawlessness. This rollercoaster of insecurity and deindividuation that runs through my neurons never ends. It gives a one-way, unlimited pass to low self-esteem and confusion.

     The truth is, I’m not perfect, and I never will be. As long as I strive for this hopeless expectation for myself, I will always lack. If I continue to rely on what I assume others think of me, I will forever be stuck on the roundabout to self-love. With every new encounter, I yield to their preferences and desires, while never thinking to check how much fuel I had left in my tank. Soon enough, I will burn out and become stuck in my confusion. Unable to help myself, I either walk the sidewalk to recovery alone or one will come to save me. When he arrives, he will come to pour into me. After I’m full and ready to exit the pattern, he will ride alongside me back to happiness. He will also offer to drive so I may restore my energy, but in the end, I must be the one to propel myself back to self-sufficiency.

     According to DoSomething.org, “low self-esteem is a thinking disorder in which an individual views him/herself as inadequate, unlovable, and/or incompetent. Once formed, this negative view permeates every thought, producing faulty assumptions and ongoing self-defeating behavior.” This is one of the root causes of anxiety, depression, and suicide in teenagers.

     They also state that due to these feelings, seven in ten girls believe they are incompetent in their looks, performance in school, and relationships with friends and family members. Additionally, 38 percent of boys in middle and high school admitted to using protein supplements and almost six percent experimented with steroids.

     The rollercoasters and roundabouts that high school students face usually do not end. It tends to become worse as Psychology Today reports that 85 percent of people worldwide have low self-esteem. You and I don’t have to experience this if we can break the cycle now.