I have never been similar to the people around me. I’ve always wanted to do things a little differently, and I’m completely content with that… but there has always been this way that people try to change me, or treat me differently just because of who I am.
As someone who started immersing myself in alternative subcultures when I was thirteen, and grew up with hair metal and ‘90s rock, I always was into that kind of music. It played a huge part in who I eventually came to be. Ever since I started falling deeper into the music rabbit hole and finding more and more people who listened to the same things as me, it has brought me a sense of connection to others that I never felt before.
Unfortunately, along the way I’ve also found people who try to change who I am so I can “fit in better.” Now, why would I do that? So I can feel like everyone else? I’m not saying everyone has to be completely unique or avoid the problematic ideas of fast fashion, but what’s so wrong with me dressing differently from you? Just because you don’t like something about me doesn’t mean I’m going to change it once you tell me to. You have to realize I’m not doing it for you – I’m doing it for myself and my enjoyment.
I see these consequences of not changing all the time. In this school, groups of “popular kids” get annoyed when anyone different from them does the same things that they do. My group of friends and I have food thrown at us constantly in the cafeteria, were secretly photographed, and pushed in the hallways. What is the reason? I don’t even know you… How about treating people with some respect – especially when you will have to be in classes with me and see me around the school?
One of the biggest things about who I am is I’ve been going to concerts since I was fifteen. I’ve met some of the greatest people at those shows. Because I’ve kept true to who I am, the people around me are the most genuine and kindest people I’ve met. I have made conversations at shows with amazing people and still keep in contact with them to this day. I’ve seen so many amazing bands that have the greatest fanbases. I have no idea what I’d be like if I would’ve changed myself, but I know I would be missing out on the greatest experiences of my life. I’m making memories with my family and friends that I will never forget.
My parting words for anyone who understands this situation? Don’t be afraid to be yourself. There is a price you have to pay; when people look at fashion that is anything but trending, they judge it. But… you’ll be so much happier being yourself than pretending to be someone you’re not. I am not someone else, and will never be someone else.