Before I say anything about high school, I want to preface that I’m a people-pleaser. Basically, I do things other people want most of the time, as long as it makes them happy or helps them out. It might not cause me any happiness, and I might hate it, but if it helps you, I’ll do it. 

     I’ve been this way since freshman year, and maybe even before then. I was a follower, not a leader, but no one brought it up. I figured it out.

    Now, I’m not saying high school helped solve my people-pleasing tendencies, because if I’m going to be honest, until my senior year hit, it only worsened. Although it may cause me some stress, if you need a question answered, I’ll find out for you. That’s just the kind of person I am.

     You need to borrow a pencil I’ll never get back?  Sure. 

     You want the answers to the homework I wasn’t going to do until you needed it?  No problem. 

     You don’t know what’s going on?  Me neither, but I’ll figure it out to help you.

      I wanted people to like me and to look up to me. I wanted those same people to be able to come up to me whenever they needed something. That was my purpose for years – being likeable. 

   You and I both know that no one is “real” in their freshman year. Everyone does things they don’t want to do just to find their crowds – except I would try for years to find mine. It was never good enough. I still have my passive tendencies, but I’ve learned how to do what’s best for me.

   As high school progressed, I gained the impression I desired for so long. People wanted to come to me for help! I was an outlet for people. But then it was draining. I was now the therapist friend, and instead of expressing my stresses, I would hear about yours.

    It wasn’t what I wanted anymore.

   Long story short, I ended up transferring to North Harford during my junior year, and I thought of it as a new start. I was still a people-pleaser but I also did what was best for me. 

    I helped when I knew the answer.

    I asked questions that I also needed answers to. 

   The whole point of high school is to build your personality, learn from your mistakes, and to grow as you make them. Even if you don’t see it, everyone has or will grow from these four years. I’m still learning; I’ll continue being the therapist friend, and I still consider certain people before myself – but I’m my own person now. I believe that’s progress.

   In the most un-cliche way possible, all I’m trying to say is that if you’re either graduating this year or just beginning, it doesn’t disadvantage others to make, not only your friends, but yourself a priority for once.